


It's A Good Thing Australia Doesn't Have Racoons, To Be Honest

by AsagiStilinski



Series: Yuri!!! Down Under [3]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Animals, Alternate Universe - Australia, Alternate Universe - Veterinarians, Character's Name Spelled as Viktor, Character's Name Spelled as Yuri, Ferrets, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Glasses, Humor, M/M, Veterinarian Victor Nikiforov, Wildlife Educator Katsuki Yuuri
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-02
Updated: 2020-03-02
Packaged: 2021-02-28 04:20:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22997590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AsagiStilinski/pseuds/AsagiStilinski
Summary: There's a chance Viktor needs glasses
Relationships: Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov
Series: Yuri!!! Down Under [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1638880
Comments: 10
Kudos: 53





	It's A Good Thing Australia Doesn't Have Racoons, To Be Honest

**Author's Note:**

> Another one for "Yuri!!! Down Under"! Want more info about this weird little verse with Australian!Yuri and vet!Viktor? Check out our Tumblr for art, inspo, and exclusive material! https://madaliceproductions.tumblr.com/
> 
> Edited by Taedae
> 
> And yes, this IS inspired by /that/ commercial https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZOeWFBy75A

"This book is giving me anxiety."

Glancing over his shoulder, Yuri's lips curved up into a smile. "Then stop reading it, love."

"But I want to see how it ends." Viktor pouted, setting the book on the table and slumping in his chair.

"Then skip to the ending."

The vet raised a brow. "... Yuri Katsuki, are you a dirty rotten page skipper?" 

"I've got an anxiety disorder, mate. I've spent my entire life trying not to set the damn thing off. You bet I'm a page skipper," Yuri laughed.

"And I thought I knew you," Viktor teased, then he glanced at the book in front of him and pursed his lips. "I mean, that's at least fifty pages of plot to skip."

"But sweetheart, if something isn't making you happy, you should change that. Reading is supposed to be fun, not hazardous to your emotional well-being. What is it you're reading, anyway? Horror?"

"Gay rom-com. I know the angst is just around the corner. I can feel it."

Yuri turned away from the stove, a spatula in hand. "Huh, I didn't even know gay rom-com books were a thing. Regardless, my advice still stands. Life is too short to do things you don't enjoy if you can avoid it."

"True," Viktor mumbled, nose wrinkling as he stared at the book again. "Okay, I'll probably just skim the parts that hurt my very soul then."

"Good on ya', love." Yuri turned the stove off and moved to the doorway to the living room. "Kiddos! Dinner!"

God, Viktor would never get tired of that. He bit his lip to stop from laughing as Chris toddled into the kitchen and went straight for his bowl, Makkachin and Vicchan right behind him. He didn't know how Makkachin had lumped herself in with the others so quickly, but he wasn't complaining.

"Hey, Viktor ... we've got a small problem," Yuri peering out from around the doorframe. "Phichit isn’t in the living room. I'm gonna check upstairs, but can you peek outside and see if he's wandering around out there? I'm worried he got out through the dryer hose... again."

"Of course, zolotse." Viktor smiled and rose from the table, heading to the door. It was past dark, but he didn't take a flashlight. The porch light would be enough for a quick scan of the yard. "Phiiiichiiit!" he called as he stepped outside, glancing around the wide-open space. "Phiiiichiiiit!" After the second call, a pair of green eyes flashed in the distance. "Ah, come here, baby. Come to your new daddy." Viktor stepped off of the porch and strode forward, scooping up the escaped ferret. 

"Oh. Huh … did you gain weight recently?" Ferrets were usually as light as a feather, but the little fuzzball in his arms was a bit chunkier than usual. Viktor wondered about the table scraps Yuri was giving them, but it’s not like he could talk, considering Makkachin shared a cookie with him barely an hour ago. And some table food could be good for pets, but still...

Humming softly, he shut the door with his foot and set the ferret on the floor—

"Good news, Viktor! I found the little scamp under the bed!" 

Viktor turned to Yuri, who was indeed holding Phichit, then glanced back at the floor, but his own ball of fur was gone.

But if Yuri had Phichit, then what the hell did he let into the house?

"...Here, kitty kitty."

"Viktor? We don't have a cat."

"Well, we didn't ten minutes ago, but we might now." At least, he _hoped_ it was a cat. He had never been more grateful that Australia didn't have raccoons or skunks...

Surely enough, a few minutes later, he and Yuri were trying to round up a stray kitten, and it wasn't going well.

"Sweetheart, how did you manage to mistake a kitten for a ferret?"

"Well it... it was dark, and I just saw those little glowing eyes, so I assumed..."

"Ferrets' eyes don't glow in the dark." Yuri bent down to try to fish the kitten out from under the couch.

"Wait, are you serious? But then... how do they see in the dark?"

"They don't. That's a myth. Ferrets can't see in total darkness any better than we can. It's low light they can see well in."

"That makes no sense." Viktor frowned, flopping onto his back as he tried again to get the kitten's attention with a rattling toy. "I thought they hunted at night?"

"No, they're crepuscular, not nocturnal."

Viktor paused, staring at his boyfriend in confusion. Usually when Yuri taught him things about animals, they were things that Viktor already knew—if only vaguely—but he only pretended not to know. It was an admittedly strange, though comforting, coping mechanism they had accidentally stumbled upon, allowing Viktor peace of mind and giving Yuri an excuse to do what he loved best—talk about animals.

But this wasn't the same, and Viktor wasn’t accustomed to the strange sense of inadequacy washing through him. "And crisp-kreeep ... crepe—"

"Crepuscular. It means they're most active at dawn and dusk. Ferrets hunt at twilight, not at night. But it’s a really common myth, so don't feel bad about getting mixed up."

Viktor's lips turned up into a shy smile, and he clutched the ferret toy he had been rattling against his chest. Yuri was so smart and intuitive, always knowing what he needed to hear and how to help.

Just as Viktor was about to burst into the sparkles and butterflies fluttering around in his heart, Yuri gave a tiny "Gottcha!" as he fished the kitten out and held her up… The little fluffy brown and black kitten who looked absolutely nothing like Phichit except for vague coloration.

"Sweetheart, I think you need glasses."

Typically, Viktor would argue that it was dark, and he hadn't been paying attention, but the kitten was so starkly different from a ferret…

"You know what? You might be right."


End file.
